Overthinking vs. Feeling: How to Know What’s Right for You

When we find ourselves overthinking, it’s often a sign that we’re trying to mentally control or rationalize something that we’re uncertain about. Overthinking can indeed be a form of cognitive distortion—where our mind creates endless loops of analysis, often leading to confusion, anxiety, or paralysis rather than clarity. In essence, overthinking keeps us stuck in our heads, disconnected from the wisdom of our bodies.

What many people don’t realize is that overthinking is often a way of avoiding our feelings. It’s as though we try to solve our emotional dilemmas by intellectualizing them, hoping we can figure them out logically. But the more we think about a decision or situation, the more we disconnect from our felt sense—the intuitive, bodily knowing that resides within us.

The Trap of Overthinking: Overthinking keeps us busy in the mind, running through pros and cons, hypothetical outcomes, and what-if scenarios. While logical reasoning has its place, it’s easy to lose touch with what our body and intuition are telling us when we rely too heavily on mental analysis. This is where the imbalance occurs: we’re overthinking because we’re under-feeling.

Feeling into Our Truth: Our bodies are constantly giving us signals—gut feelings, tension, expansiveness, or a sense of unease. These physical sensations form what is called the felt sense—an intuitive, somatic knowing that is often more reliable than our mind’s constant chatter. The felt sense is the body’s way of guiding us toward what feels right or wrong, but it’s something we can only access when we slow down and pay attention to how we feel, not just what we think.

So, how do we know if something is right for us?

1. Drop Out of the Mind and Into the Body: When you find yourself overthinking, pause. Shift your attention from the mental loops and bring your awareness to your body. Take a few deep breaths and notice what sensations arise. Does the situation feel heavy or light? Does your body contract or expand when you think about it? These physical sensations often hold more truth than the stories we create in our minds.
2. Trust Your Gut: That “gut feeling” we often talk about is real. The enteric nervous system, often referred to as the “second brain,” is where many of our intuitive signals come from. If you feel a deep sense of knowing in your gut—whether it’s excitement or apprehension—pay attention to it. This is your body’s way of guiding you toward what is aligned with your truth.
3. Check In With Your Heart: Sometimes we overthink because we’re afraid of making the wrong decision or because our emotions are clouding our judgment. In these moments, ask yourself: What does my heart feel? The heart is a center of emotional intelligence, and often the answer you seek is less about logic and more about whether something resonates with you on a heart level. Does the decision bring you peace, joy, or a sense of alignment?
4. Notice the Patterns of Resistance or Flow: If you feel like you’re forcing yourself into a decision or situation, it may be a sign that it’s not right for you. On the other hand, if things feel like they are naturally unfolding or there’s a sense of ease (even if it’s scary), that’s often a sign of alignment. Pay attention to whether you feel resistance in your body or a sense of flow and openness.
5. Practice Embodied Presence: Regular practices like mindfulness, breathwork, or somatic awareness can help you stay connected to your body and your felt sense. The more attuned you are to your physical and emotional signals, the easier it will be to notice when something feels right or wrong.

In the end, overthinking keeps us in our heads, while our body holds the wisdom we need. If you’re struggling with a decision, stop trying to solve it intellectually. Instead, drop into your body, tune into your feelings, and trust that your intuition—your felt sense—will guide you toward the truth.