You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. – Jim Rohn
Who are the five people you spend the most amount of time with? What is your relationship like? Do they bring out the best in you? Do they support your dreams and cheer on your efforts? Do they inspire you and see the potential in you?
If this quote is true, then you should really consider the company you most keep – really think about who it is you want to have in your corner given that your company becomes your network. Who you surround yourself with can elevate you as much as it can drag you down. They influence your opinions and choices and help shape who you are – so I encourage you to choose wisely. Make an effort to surround yourself with clever, competent and positive people who will inspire and impact your life in a positive way. If you currently don’t, it’s never too late to find a new group of friends who will! Friends can help make the difference between an ordinary and extraordinary life.
Many times we allow circumstance to determine who our friends are. Maybe you grew up together. Maybe you met at work. Maybe you just wanted to feel like you belonged. Don’t allow chance to be the determining factor in who’s company you keep.
What are some important qualities you would like your friends to have? What values are important to you that you would like them to respect? What things would you like to work on yourself that they could inspire you with?
Here’s a great exercise on how to assess the company you keep!
- Top 20. Grab a sheet of people and write down the names of the 20 people you are closest to.
- Circle 10. Based on what they are doing with their lives, circle 10 of the names of people that inspire you the most – who’s lives and values seem most in line with your own. If you can’t come up with 10 then only circle those who truly bring value to your life.
- List 10. Make a list of up to 10 people you know and admire but whom you are not very close with. Think of ways in which you could become better friends.
- Combine. Combine both of your lists of 10 to create your new “inner circle.”
Just as important as it is to highlight those friends you want in your life, pay attention to those who aren’t serving your greater good. The more you pay attention to your relationships, the more you will be able to notice those that drain you, those that require real effort, those that feel negative, and those that make you feel less than. You are not doing anyone any favours by entertaining these relationships.
You are in charge of how your react to the relationships in your life. You can allow for the negativity to rule over you or you can take control and create change. We need friends to thrive – the right friends. The choice it yours, make it count!